every 1st september we joke about getting ready for hogwarts to cover up the very real and very very deep scars of never getting our letters
okay so here’s what actually happened:
terezi was a really great GM, they all had tons of fun! even karkat, though he struggled to admit it.
they fought many adventures together.
rose and kanaya spent significant extra time fleshing out their characters’ backstories, while naked.
(sultry fiction was written.)
This is way, way better.
For the winTHIS IS MY PHILOSOPHY.
like how hilarious. what comedic gold. terezi gets her friends to roleplay with her bc it’s something she really enjoys and not only to they not take it seriously from the get go but they whine and complain and treat it as a joke and eventually they all ditch her and leave her sitting at the table looking hurt and dejected. like what about that is funny?? what about having your friends mock your interests and treat them like a joke and make you feel like shit is comedic?? esp when, in canon, terezi has already been beaten down physically, mentally and emotionally & has been nigh entirely stripped of her self worth and confidence, and half the reason gamzee’s abuse was allowed to escalate to the point it’s at right now is because none of her friends noticed or cared that she was being abused. like i don’t get why this is funny or amusing or why terezi had to be the butt of the fucking joke.
not to mention that they all go off to watch one of karkat’s movies which almost all of them have denounced at least once in canon because humoring a BOY’s interest that you don’t share is preferable to a GIRL’s right?? because everyone would rather go watch a shitty romcom that almost all of them have stated they have no interest in than stick around and play a game together, if not because they enjoy it, than at least because it’s something that means a lot to THEIR FRIEND. like seriously what the actual FUCK.
But man, this one was going so well. I was invested in this story, and not just because it was a giant D&D reference. (Okay, the roleplay reference helped but only because it creates a familiar lingo through which the characters can be expressed.)
And I don’t know where this joke comes from. One of the things I like about Homestuck is that none of the kids plays the eye-rolling straight man. They all love terrible embarrassing things. And even when they’re mocking each other, they’re at least playing along.
Like, Dave roleplayed furries with Jade and drew Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff with ears and snoots for her. Dave played art games with Terezi over Pesterchum. Rose joined Dave for a kickin’ rad two-person dance party on Derse, even though she doesn’t have any real interest in his kind of music. Kanaya…for fucks’ sake, Kanaya? ”Lousy st8pid godd8mn supportive fri8nd” Kanaya, the compulsive mediator, is the one who seconds the motion to bail on Terezi? Bullshit.
Delicate Arch, Utah. A Multi-Camera 360º Startrail Panorama by Vincent Brady.
Why thank you! And I certainly do have thoughts to share—
So on a technical level, this ending sucked. The last page comes out of nowhere. I’m not even going to pretend to equivocate on this; the story had a good setup going, characters interacting and showing interest, and suddenly it was “lol no one cares, abandon ship”. The last page doesn’t follow from the previous page in any sensible manner; it’s like the whole middle part of the story is missing, so the conclusion is kind of a non sequitur.
There would have to be a lot more story for that ending to make any sort of sense. Aside from Dave (who was mostly a cardboard cutout this time around) everyone seemed into it up until then, even if they were getting told to reign in their more ridiculous behavior (which is kind of what the GM is supposed to do) and Karkat was being a childish jerk about it (which is very Karkat). They were just getting started with pre-game setup and banter.
These are kids that don’t give up easily, especially not after some minor disagreements, especially not among this group, who all enjoy talking shit to and about one another. Instead, we get a panel of everyone staring at Terezi in silence, and then Dave - arguably the person who likes Terezi the most, and the person who was causing Terezi the least amount of shit - casually invites the group, without Terezi, to go do something else instead. Everyone practically falls over themselves to take his idea, all the while acting as if Terezi weren’t even there.
That’s the other big problem I have with the ending: it’s mean. It’s not funny, or poignant, or even lolrandom; it was the kind of passive-aggressive bullying mean children do to a child they don’t really like and were just humoring for a while because they were told to.
Why would these characters do that? It’s not in character for any of them. Why tell a story like this? It’s petty and cruel, and looks even more petty and cruel considering the tacked-on ending. I can’t see any charitable interpretations for it; the closest I can come is that the writer got really lazy about the ending.
In retrospect, this probably would’ve been the kind of comic to leave without an ending. There are so many potentials to consider in terms of “homestuck characters playing D&D together,” it would’ve been better to just leave it with a to-be-continued somehow. Use it as a fill-in idea for between weeks! Everyone was obviously so into it before the rushed ending came out, so why not have that one on standby so that they can pick it up later on and continue the silly story of the most ridiculous group of roleplayers ever assembled, rather than putting a bullet between the eyes of an otherwise good idea and ending it on a mean-spirited note.
That would have been a great idea! It would have given the story the space a story of its kind needs - anyone who’s played a tabletop RPG is all too familiar with how long they take and how much player banter there is - and would have allowed for good characterization, which would facilitate the laughing-with we like so much in Homestuck, rather than the mean, uncomfortable laughing-at this comic is inviting us to do.
(vv, I don’t think I can easily find that post of yours, but thank you again for articulating that concept. It puts into perspective what’s so off about so many of these PxS stories.)
|—||"Snuff" by Terry Pratchett (via youaristocat)|
In this alternate version of Paradox Space, Terezi’s friends don’t reluctantly put up with her roleplaying.
In this version, Terezi’s friends ask her to roleplay with them. They’ve all got their various problems and obsessions with themselves and each other, and they feel like they’re stagnating on the meteor. Roleplaying is a bit of escapism for them, but more importantly, it helps them feel like they’re doing something original and creative.
Dave worries that his pop culture references are stuck in 2008, and he’s afraid that his raps are getting stale. But during these Scalemate RPs, he can create new stories and explore the silliness of Alternian culture while using (and reinventing) the Earth noir tropes that he knows. He doesn’t think this is dumb as shit, he thinks this is dope as shit.
For Terezi, the roleplaying is maybe a bit different. It reminds her of home, both the pleasant (Nepeta) and unpleasant (Vriska) parts of it, so there’s some complex feelings that go along with it. But now she can use it as a tool to get to know her lab-mates better, and she gets the same creative satisfaction out of it that they do. And most importantly, she knows that she’s helping her friends in a way that only she can.
In this alternate version of Paradox Space, Terezi’s friends don’t get up and leave in the middle of a roleplaying session or tell her it’s dumb. Instead…
That’s how I imagine it, at least.
This is so much better and fun than everybody shitting all over Terezi. Accept no substitute canons.
An Andalite cloud artist and her apprentice.
Can’t Help Falling In Love With You (Cover) - Fleet Foxes
Yo Pataki is a re imagining of the Hey Arnold characters as young adults. The series (hypothetically) would center around a 26 year old Helga Pataki who is now a bartender works at the family owned business, Big Bob’s Cafe.
When Big Bob’s Beepers goes out of business, Miriam is forced to attend AA meetings for her alcohol problem. 26 year old Helga Pataki is forced to drop out of school to help support her family. She now works as a bartender at the new family business, Big Bob’s Cafe.
Sid formed electronic band, Wheezin’ Ed with childhood classmates Phoebe and Stinky. Due to his irrational paranoia of becoming famous and being harassed by paparazzi, he wears an antique diving helmet at gigs to conceal his identity.
Helga’s best friend Phoebe Heyerdahl earns her Ph.D in neuroscience at the age of 17. In her free time she provides the vocals in Sid’s band, Wheezin’ Ed as a way to unwind. She is in an on again / off again relationship with Gerald.
Stinky Peterson’s smooth southern drawl earned him a job as a late night radio host. He also plays bass in Sid’s band, which has made him popular among the ladies.
After witnessing Helga mercilessly attack Brainy throughout their childhood, Sheena is inspired to become an advocate for domestic violence victims. She is married to childhood sweetheart, Eugene Horowitz. Ironically, there is a belief among her friends that she physically abuses Eugene due to her large size and Eugene’s own clumsiness.
Brainy works as a one hour photo technician. He has apparently outgrown his obsession with Helga and now spends much of his time hanging around P.S. 118 where he snaps pictures of children, particularly little girls with blond hair.
Rhonda Wellington Lloyd inherited her family’s fortune and is now a successful fashion designer. She is narrow minded and highly competitive, referring to herself as the queen of fashion. Former best friend, Nadine claims Rhonda developed a severe cocaine problem to cope with her loneliness.
Mr. Green leaves his meat market in the care of Harold Berman after he runs for city councilman. Harold converts Green Meats into a kosher meat marker out of respect for his Jewish faith. He is in a relationship with Big Patty.
After earning her degree in entomology Nadine begins teaching 4th grade science at P.S. 118. She’s also a self proclaimed bug whisperer, which makes people uncomfortable. Former best friend Rhonda claims Nadine can’t keep a boyfriend because they’re weirded out by her unusual fascination with tarantulas.
Despite a lifetime of unusual bad luck, Eugene Horowitz followed his dream of becoming a famous Broadway actor. He manages to incorporate his clumsy behavior into his act which turns out to be so well received it lands him the leading role in a television series based on the play, Eugene Eugene.
Former city arm wrestling champion Patricia Smith turned weightlifter became an internet phenomenon after videos of her in the gym surfaced on social media. She’s referred to as “Big Patty” in memes which according to Harold, makes her feel socially awkward.
Gerald Johanessen currently attends Hillwood School of Art & Design and is working towards a degree in film and television. He creates short films based on the urban legends from his childhood with his good friend, Fuzzy Slippers. After making plans to leave for LA after graduating, Phoebe decides its best to end their relationship for good in order for him to pursue his dream.
While working as a waiter, Lila decides to pursue a career in stage acting. She makes her Broadway Musical debut alongside Eugene. He lovable personality and on stage chemistry with Eugene lead to the two starring in their on successful tv sitcom.
After graduating from college Arnold moved away to reunite with his parents in San Lorenzo, where he remained for 5 years. He returns home when he receives news that Grandpa Phil passed away. With no other other tenants living in the boarding house other than Grandma Gertrude, he decides he is more needed in Hillwood. Arnold works closely with children as a child psychologist. And, according to Gerald, Helga is noticeably more affectionate to Arnold now.
After gaining the courage to step down from his stoop, Stoop Kid stumbles upon a winning 10 million dollar lottery ticket. With his new found fortune, he decides to travel the world with his lawn chair in search of grand stoops to take selfies on which he refers to as #StoopSelfies. He catalogs his journeys on his blog, The Stoop Connoisseur.
This is phenomenal.